Are We There Yet?

That is exactly how I felt ALL day yesterday - like I was 5 years old and in the backseat of my mom's station wagon again.  I kept thinking "How am I ever going to do this for a whole month?!"  Then, of course, the mind games began.  "This morning I was so excited to not be gorging on junk today.  What happened?"  As I started to analyze why I was hating this diet already, I realized two things:  the first, that if it weren't for you ladies going on this journey with me I probably would have quit - or at least cheated - already;  and the second, the first day is always the hardest.  And now I know why.  Every day after the first day, you can look back with pride at what you've accomplished so far.  You find motivation in the pounds you've already lost and the days you've stuck to protocol.  On the first day, you have none of that - only the thought of how far you have to go.

So first, Jamie and  Tina, if your day was anything like mine, today will likely be the worst.  Hang in there and give yourself some credit - you can do this!  I bought a scale last night (analog, per Tina's recommendation) and weighed myself this morning.  I wish I had bought it the first day so I could be sure it's callibrated the same as Tara's, but there is no going back now, so I am just going to say that it is which means:  I lost 5 pounds after the first day of the VLCD!!!  5 pounds!  And now, I have found my motivation.  I am already determined to keep my mind in a more positive place today. 

A few other things I am noticing:  I went to bed earlier last night (which for me is about 11pm).  As a result I am waking up earlier.  Because I am not snacking and I think I am hungry - but really just bored - I go to bed to avoid sitting there thinking about food.  In the long run, the new sleep schedule will be much healthier for me.  I have also decided that instead of looking forward to the end of this long, dreadful, no-snacking month, I am going to be present in each moment.  Part of never going back to this state I am in now (you know, the one where nothing in your closet fits like it should), is acknowledging and remembering the steps I had to take to get out of this mess.