Saturday, April 2, 2011
Question
We are suppose to take the meds right away in the morning right? And then stop eating at 6pm and take the meds before bed? I want to make sure I'm doing it right and how will I know if I messed it up by forgetting Friday night and not taking it til later Saturday morning. What's the word, Bec? Let me know if I"ve totally ruined it already!
I am still here, Peeps!
Tara has been very good to call me often and I have called her with questions about the diet. The first day was the worst! I was so hungry! But very encouraged by the 5 lbs. two of you lost. Okay, so Tuesday and Wednesday were my gorge days and the diet began on Thursday. I'm surprised I made it through the day with out unconsciously putting something in my mouth. I weighed in at Tara's at 208-wearing jeans and a sweatshirt. I weighed myself at my mom's Friday morning on a digital scale and weighed 201.4, so I am interested to see what it is on Tara's scale monday. Friday night, I was so tired, I forgot to take the "juice" and Saturday, I told everyone to leave me alone so I could sleep in and didn't take the "juice" til 11:30. How far back is that going to set me and now do I start with breakfast? Okay, just talked to Tara and she filled me in. I actually skipped my cooking class on Thursday, because we cook a meal and sit down to eat it and I just wasn't up to telling everyone about my new diet and I wanted to avoid temptation. My husband apologized for bringing the 12 pack of soda home and asked me if he could bring some eggrolls home. I told him to eat them in the car. He's trying! So, girlies, so far so good. When my mind wonders to Starbucks or somthing, I just remember -it never really tasted good in the first place or grossed me out aftyer I stuffed my face.
Friday, April 1, 2011
Metamorphosis
Before I spend an hour reading all of your posts and comments - and then commenting myself, I want to focus on putting up a post of my own, without distractions. The best thing about today was that I kept so busy, I barely thought about eating (until the dreadful Easter Bunny movie, of course!). That being said, the downside to this diet is that you can't keep too busy because if you don't make time to go home during the day you can't really pick up much to eat while you're out. Unless, of course, you stop to buy an apple somewhere.
Like each of you, I am having my own new revelations each day. Ok, maybe several a day. Here is the biggest one for me so far: I don't always have to do things on my own. It's o.k. to want, or even need, the help of other people. I think I've spent so many years proving to myself that I can do it all alone, that I have actually convinced myself that I prefer it that way. And the truth is, that's not true at all. Little did I know that the events of this past year were preparing me for this 30 day adventure. I've made more friends, kept up with more friends, been more social, spent more time with others and less time alone than any other time in the past 6 years. To be honest, some days it drove me nuts. The old me kept telling the new me that I just needed some "alone" time. Don't get me wrong, everyone needs alone time to reflect and just catch a breath; however, I had conditioned myself to think that I prefer to be alone. Little did I know that bit by bit I was opening up and allowing myself to let go of some of my independence and to let others in.
Tonight, I was thinking about this whole diet - wondering why it was working and why I wasn't depressed by the fact that I have 25 days to go. That's when I began to realize everything I am sharing here. I have always shied away from working out with others, dieting with others, basically because I never wanted to admit that I needed help and accountability partners (and because I didn't want to admit out loud that I needed to get healthy in the first place, but we'll save that for another session). The truth is, I have been missing out. For the first time in a long time, I am glad I am in this with someone else - with you girls! Maybe I could have done it without you, but not as well as I am doing it with you. Piece by piece, I am loving the new me.
Like each of you, I am having my own new revelations each day. Ok, maybe several a day. Here is the biggest one for me so far: I don't always have to do things on my own. It's o.k. to want, or even need, the help of other people. I think I've spent so many years proving to myself that I can do it all alone, that I have actually convinced myself that I prefer it that way. And the truth is, that's not true at all. Little did I know that the events of this past year were preparing me for this 30 day adventure. I've made more friends, kept up with more friends, been more social, spent more time with others and less time alone than any other time in the past 6 years. To be honest, some days it drove me nuts. The old me kept telling the new me that I just needed some "alone" time. Don't get me wrong, everyone needs alone time to reflect and just catch a breath; however, I had conditioned myself to think that I prefer to be alone. Little did I know that bit by bit I was opening up and allowing myself to let go of some of my independence and to let others in.
Tonight, I was thinking about this whole diet - wondering why it was working and why I wasn't depressed by the fact that I have 25 days to go. That's when I began to realize everything I am sharing here. I have always shied away from working out with others, dieting with others, basically because I never wanted to admit that I needed help and accountability partners (and because I didn't want to admit out loud that I needed to get healthy in the first place, but we'll save that for another session). The truth is, I have been missing out. For the first time in a long time, I am glad I am in this with someone else - with you girls! Maybe I could have done it without you, but not as well as I am doing it with you. Piece by piece, I am loving the new me.
Things I have learned today...
1. Going to a movie that shows Easter candy galore was like a porno. What the hell were we thinking??
2. I couldn't do this without my coffee maker or George Foreman grill. I have a crush on Mr. Foreman because damn that thing is GREAT!
3. I have a cupboard full of spices that I have never appreciated until now.
4. Cinnamon is now my new best friend.
5. I need to stay busy or out of my house because I snack when I am bored.
6. I sincerely couldn't do this without you 3. It is soooo therapeutic to write these things down.
I have already looked back on old posts from a mere 2 days ago and feel like I am making progress. Again, all the things I preached as a Jenny Craiger(or as we called ourselves "Jenny Keggers" haha but I digress) but never practiced. Turns out I did know what I was talking about!
Thanks for the inspiration and the giggles and the motivation to keep my ass going on this thing. It will alllllll be worth it! In fact, it already is! :)
1. Going to a movie that shows Easter candy galore was like a porno. What the hell were we thinking??
2. I couldn't do this without my coffee maker or George Foreman grill. I have a crush on Mr. Foreman because damn that thing is GREAT!
3. I have a cupboard full of spices that I have never appreciated until now.
4. Cinnamon is now my new best friend.
5. I need to stay busy or out of my house because I snack when I am bored.
6. I sincerely couldn't do this without you 3. It is soooo therapeutic to write these things down.
I have already looked back on old posts from a mere 2 days ago and feel like I am making progress. Again, all the things I preached as a Jenny Craiger(or as we called ourselves "Jenny Keggers" haha but I digress) but never practiced. Turns out I did know what I was talking about!
Thanks for the inspiration and the giggles and the motivation to keep my ass going on this thing. It will alllllll be worth it! In fact, it already is! :)
Jaaaaaiiiimmmmeee where arrrrree yyooouuuuu?
Just missing you! Hope you are checking in to stay motivated and encouraged! Love you.
Tangled.. and the life it brings.
This morning we have just rented Tangled, one of my favorite Disney movies. Its music and magic has temporarily taken over my home. And, that is just fine with me. Julia is entranced allowing some serious "me" time. She has not moved off the couch (or spoken to me) for 4 minutes. I think we are going for a record.
As I went to bed last night, my stomach sounded like a babbling brook. I read a few more chapters of my book and then turned off the light to ignore it. It worked. Distraction and pure will to ignore these things works.
This whole situation has helped me kick start another scary journey. Some real soul searching. Why have I let myself get like this and why haven't I been able to do anything about it before? Why do I still feel an instinct of "forget this.. I look fine" as I search for a random excuse here or there to quit? Why am I feeling so angry whenever Allen asks me any particulars about the diet? Who am I really upset with, him or me?
These are all of the things I am tackling right now. Not on an every minute basis, but a little nagging thought that ebbs in the back of my head. To write them almost seems more real than thinking of them. However, I have come to a realization that this whole weight-loss journey is more of a Tangled mess than I originally signed up for. And I am OK with that. If losing weight was merely about being a smaller size, I am not interested it. I think that is why, physically, I always appear to myself smaller than I really am. Because, truly, if I am this weight for the rest of my life I could accept that and move on, happily. BUT, if weight loss is more about getting rid of a deeper issue within that manifests itself my padding my body with lumps and rolls of unwanted waste.. then I am all in. That is what is worth this battle for me. That is my song and inspiration for the rest of this journey. This Tangled mess has got to go. The pounds, guilt, frustration, anger, disappointment and forgotten personal goals and victories. I can't wait for the finish line, when my outside shows the internal work I have done.
As the princess in Tangled exclaims many times over "I am NEVER going back". I am getting out of this tangled web I've weaved.
As I went to bed last night, my stomach sounded like a babbling brook. I read a few more chapters of my book and then turned off the light to ignore it. It worked. Distraction and pure will to ignore these things works.
This whole situation has helped me kick start another scary journey. Some real soul searching. Why have I let myself get like this and why haven't I been able to do anything about it before? Why do I still feel an instinct of "forget this.. I look fine" as I search for a random excuse here or there to quit? Why am I feeling so angry whenever Allen asks me any particulars about the diet? Who am I really upset with, him or me?
These are all of the things I am tackling right now. Not on an every minute basis, but a little nagging thought that ebbs in the back of my head. To write them almost seems more real than thinking of them. However, I have come to a realization that this whole weight-loss journey is more of a Tangled mess than I originally signed up for. And I am OK with that. If losing weight was merely about being a smaller size, I am not interested it. I think that is why, physically, I always appear to myself smaller than I really am. Because, truly, if I am this weight for the rest of my life I could accept that and move on, happily. BUT, if weight loss is more about getting rid of a deeper issue within that manifests itself my padding my body with lumps and rolls of unwanted waste.. then I am all in. That is what is worth this battle for me. That is my song and inspiration for the rest of this journey. This Tangled mess has got to go. The pounds, guilt, frustration, anger, disappointment and forgotten personal goals and victories. I can't wait for the finish line, when my outside shows the internal work I have done.
As the princess in Tangled exclaims many times over "I am NEVER going back". I am getting out of this tangled web I've weaved.
April Fools Day!
Today my inspiration is this...
April Fools day is my beautiful Grandma Garnette's birthday. She is 96! She lives on top of a mountain in West Virginia. She is an unbelievably strong woman. She had 5 children and became a widow when her youngest was 10. She lives in the same house that all of her kids were born and eats a Honeybun(little debbie processed donut) every morning for breakfast. I have never, ever heard an unkind word come out of her mouth. She always, always, always says in her sweet southern drawl "well, I love you honey" at the end of every conversation I have ever had with her. She has 5 kids, 10 grandkids, 8 great grandkids and 2 great great grandkids. She still sends me and my girls a b-day and C-mas card every year in her own writing.
We could all be so lucky to be like Grandma Garnette!
April Fools day is my beautiful Grandma Garnette's birthday. She is 96! She lives on top of a mountain in West Virginia. She is an unbelievably strong woman. She had 5 children and became a widow when her youngest was 10. She lives in the same house that all of her kids were born and eats a Honeybun(little debbie processed donut) every morning for breakfast. I have never, ever heard an unkind word come out of her mouth. She always, always, always says in her sweet southern drawl "well, I love you honey" at the end of every conversation I have ever had with her. She has 5 kids, 10 grandkids, 8 great grandkids and 2 great great grandkids. She still sends me and my girls a b-day and C-mas card every year in her own writing.
We could all be so lucky to be like Grandma Garnette!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)